My split mind races to weigh the pros and cons as Sabina looks at me concerned. I suck in a long deep breath and feel my heart sink. "I'm so sorry. I don't even know how to say this but I have to tell you... Mark. He's my ex."
I see her eyes go dark and a faint vein raise on her forehead. I realise in a shatteringly clear moment that I need her to be calm. I need her to pretend she doesn't know so I can find a solution. Justice. "Listen to me, I have a plan but you need to act like you don't know. Can you do that?" "It better be one mother fucker of a plan Mel."
I watch her walk to him, her hips swaying exageratedly. If anyone could pull this off it was her. I slide behind a group of people to watch her smile and wave her hand in my direction with the perfect mix of bordom and exhasperation. I scan his face and see him relax. He gently pull her to him and grazes his lips across her neck.
That was the moment I realised the first time I saw Sabina wasn't at the aquarium, it was Malabar. The dark haired girl eating Naan and smiling. She's been dating Mark for months. I shiver as a bead of rain slides down my eyelash, my shirt clinging to my skin. Sabina's hands flail wildly as she spits venom at him. She put it together. She knows Mark is my ex. I start to cross the road when I see Mark's face go dark. I'm halfway across the road when I see her turn away from him. She sees me and we lock eyes, I see her anger slip into softness. I see Mark push her. I see the car coming. I see her body flung into the air and spin like a ragdoll. I feel myself vomit. That's all I remember.
"That's good" my therapist coos at me. "That's the most detail you've remembered so far, that's great work. Now have you thought of a passion project yet?" The passion project was a healing tool meant to empower me, give me purpose and direction. I thought it was all bullshit until I found one, and now I'm a person born anew. I got in touch with Mark when the 6 month probation sentence for Sabina's 'accidental death' was made public. I feel all the pain from the trial melt away standing on the street in the warm winter sunshine, admiring the perfectly polished rims and new windshield of my beautiful car. I feel calm as I hear a roaring engine approaching. The stress of parking it here weekly has paid off. I see Mark walking towards me and I throw the keys through the air, he catches them smiling. He always loved my car. "Glad there's no hard feelings, Mel" He calls out walking to the drivers side door, but I'm already walking away as the black Plymouth pulls up.